Monthly Archives: November 2006

The Late Night Mash

79m.jpgThere’s a new creative community over at the Late Night Mash. It’s hosted by soap star Dan McVicar who has recently taken the vlogosphere by storm.

It’s a pretty cool setup. I created an account a while back and have uploaded a couple things to the site. Dan does a Monday through Friday show.

I recently uploaded the couch song video from this vlog. He used it in the mash today and totally made fun of me and called me names. w00t! It’s awesome!

Update: Dan takes a look back at a month of mashes on the Dec 1st show. I think he was afraid that I was upset due to my not-serious comments above. To the contrary, I had a good laugh at the intro and I was stoked see my little song on the mash. Keep it up Dan!


bathroom1-250-blur.jpgI wrote this on June 8th, 2006 at 12:14am after a couple of beers and sent it to a friend. Thought I’d put it here so I don’t forget.

I wasn’t one that grew up thinking “I want to be an famous actor in movies when I grow up.” So many do though.

I’m not wondering why “now,” as in the timing of it. I’ve been through that process and I’m ok with where I’m at.

I’m wondering what drives a performer.

ima get the obvious ones out of the way. A need for attention. For validation. For perceived acceptance and love. For recognition.

there are highs but there are lows as well. how much of it is masochism? there’s a lot of rejection and hurtful moments to deal with.

i can’t say for sure. i can only look at myself and ask the question. i hear the echo of the question ring out in the vast darkness. what comes back to my ears?

yeah, i need validation and attention. but the times i’ve been recognized for a role or performance in “every day life” did nothing for me. so it’s not that. ovations are nice but that doesn’t do it for me either. i don’t live for the applause at the end. in fact, that might be my least favorite part because it signifies that it’s over.

What’s over? THE CREATION.

The whole process from audition prep to audition to rehearsals to discovery to performace. Performance is fun and it’s the end result, but i can’t say for sure that’s why i do it. i look forward to it. to show off what’s been created.

creation’s the thing man.


Not much, you?

Busy, sick, busy, balance.

I don’t write about personal stuff on my blog. I’m just not comfortable with putting it all out there for people to read and know my business. I’ll write about my struggles with trying to stay in shape (I’m currently in the fall/winter fattening up stage so that I’ll have something to do in the spring, ha). But I generally don’t write about my personal life. I mean, I started this thing to be a creative outlet and hopefully entertain some folks.

Some people will write cryptic or ambiguous things so that you know something is going on but you don’t know what. Then that leads people to start asking around and maybe rumors get started. So I just avoid it altogether.

Vulnerability. It’s scary. I don’t let down my guard very often. Few people get to see me in that state. I value those people very much and I don’t know what I’d do without them. I may sometimes live my life with my heart on my sleeve but you’d never know it was there.

Anyway, nothing’s changing here, I just needed a topic to post on since it’s been a while. It’s good to see all of you again, dear readers. And when I get to feeling better, I’ll do something funny.

P.S. The Lab Rats intro finally made The Show! Ze gave us an assignment as well.